Old age is a bitch, the indignities of life in the 30s; life measured by your job, car you drive, neighbourhood you live in etc.

By Silas Nyanchwani
The other night, while on a night out with family members among them some really two hot 20-year-old nieces, one of them said something that sent chills down my spine.

You know that feeling when you miss a step, or when your phone nearly falls down, or you touch your pocket you can’t feel it?

“We know men like you in a club. We look at you, and we can tell if you are loaded or not,” she said, referring to our age (me and my friend now in the unromantic phase of life-read 30s-according to Brabetts Bayern Munich in reference to our age.)

“If you are having one beer we will know you are stingy and avoid you,” she said before she disappeared to dance with strangers. Apparently, the site of several beers and a good mzinga sends the right message.

For the first time I noticed the gaping age difference. She is at a stage in her life where she is immortal. Young and old men admire her and she is on top of the world literally.

On my end, I am suffering the indignities of life in the 30s where life is measured by your job, the car you drive, and the neighbourhood you live in. Woe betide you if you succumbed to the pressures of your peers to look good and keep up with the Joneses.

Also, old age is here.

Whereas in the past we could go to KBC and drown warm beer, having cheery conversation before we went to nightclubs to dance on a single beer or Alvaro the whole night or drink some more if HELB had been disbursed nowadays, nowadays biologically it is not possible. Back then we would arrive in our rooms at 6 a.m. and after two hours of sleep, wake up and run errands before drinking later in the day.

Nowadays you can’t pull this move. A night in a club is so punitive given the noise and the stinky pheromones. Lately, I gravitate towards quieter restaurants where it is possible to have a conversation. I prefer staying at home reading or watching.

A few years back I used to put so much sugar in my tea and friends used to be shocked at my recklessness. Nowadays I am worried about the sugar intake, doctors have warned that I have to slow down on red meat and the tummy has grown to have a life of its own. It is ugly, I need money make it look attractive.

Old age is a bitch.

Here is what Philip Roth writes in his book, Everyman
“Had he been aware of the mortal suffering of every man and woman he happened to have known during all his years of professional life, of each one’s painful story of regret, of loss and stoicism, of fear and panic and isolation and dread, had he learned of every last thing they had once been vitally theirs and how, systematically, they were being destroyed, he would have had to stay on phone through the night, making another 100 calls, at least. Old age isn’t a battle; old age is a massacre.

And my lady, Nora Ephron puts it even better. When you are old,
“You take so many pills in the morning you don’t have room for breakfast.

Meanwhile, there is a new conversation about CAT scans and MRIs. Everywhere you look there is a cancer. Once a week there is some sort of bad news. Once a month there is a funeral. You lose close friends and you discover one of the worst truths of old age: they’re irreplaceable. People who run four miles a day and eat only nuts and berries drop dead. People who drink a quart of whiskey and smoke two packs of cigarette a day drop dead. You are suddenly in a lottery, the ultimate game of chance, and someday your luck wil run out. Everybody dies. There is nothing you can do about it. Whether or not you eat six almonds every day. Whether or not you believe in God…”

Ephron died in 2012, nearly ten years since writing this piece.

Some thoughts for the evening.

Mimi wacha niende nyumbani kucheza na kasichana.
Kesho pia ni siku.
Read more at NewsToday

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Noontime Thoughts
On the choice not to give birth
By Silas Nyanchwani
My buddy, Mwangi Khimani yesterday asked, given what you know now, the experiences you have had, if you were to be given a choice on whether to be born or not, would you have applied to be born?

My answer was a definite NO. Whereas I live my life as an incurable pessimist, I harbour in my hearts a perfect, “WAKANDA” type of a world and some naive optimism that things can get better despite evidence to the contrary.

When I see young children, toddlers being exposed to the pollution in town as their mothers use them to beg, my heart bleeds. When we burn people in churches, my heart bleeds. When police shoot innocent protesters, my heart bleeds. When young people die, like in the last three weeks, I have lost two of my former schoolmates at a fairly young age, my heart cries. When I see sick people in the hospital, people involved in accidents, people involved in a terror attack, victims of domestic violence, rape, pollution, corruption and what have you, I ask God WHY?

Over the weekend, some lady was interviewed by my lady Victoria Rubadiri. The lady said she wants to remain childless for the rest of her life. It is one of those concepts most people can’t wrap their heads around. That is why she was insulted pretty badly.

Last year, the New Yorker Magazine did a very good profile of the South African philosopher, David Benatar, dubbed as the most pessimist philosopher in the world. He is an anti-natalist: People who believe that life is so bad, so painful, that human beings should stop having children for reasons of compassion.
“While good people go to great lengths to spare their children from suffering, few of them seem to notice that the one (and only) guaranteed way to prevent all the suffering of their children is not to bring those children into existence in the first place,” Benatar wrote in his 2006 book, Better Never to Have Been: The Harm of Coming Into Existence.” (As quoted in the New Yorker.)

This is an idea that I once possessed. That I married and I have a daughter, I don’t how that happened. Do I regret having broken my youthful idealism creed of never marrying and giving birth? Only to an extent that I can’t afford to live without the little girl.

Anti-natalism is a choice worth thinking about. But in life, I learned at a young age never to take extremes. It is always safer to be somewhere in the middle.

As a Christian, I do believe that there is a divine pre-destination to our being on earth.

I have been to a labour ward. I saw women dragging their feet in pain, cursing and crying as the pains grew excruciatingly. I have seen them lean on walls, hang on the rails, crying that they want to die. I have heard them cry, such scary screaming, it deafens you. It is messy in the labour ward. You would wonder how a woman can ever choose to give birth again?

But they do. Our grandmothers used to pop them out like 10-13. For a corporate woman , two is more than enough, always delivered through the caesarian section, some argue because, they don’t want to tamper with the sexual lifestyle after birth.

But what makes me think there is God in all this, is fairly simple: Once a woman has held the kid in her hand, the joy, the happiness in her face, is not something science can explain. And a father who embraces the child, however poor, becomes so happy, it gives him a reason to wake up every day to ensure the young one will never sleep hungry or lack to the best of his ability.

Whether you believe in evolution or God, you discover that nature ensures that we must procreate. Women who don’t procreate are sometimes faced with complications that force doctors to compel them to give birth in order to do away with the problems. There is also the disputed “biological urge”, a craving that strikes women between 25-35, and where with or without a husband they choose to have the baby anyway. For men, the urge is not as strong, but there is a happiness that a man derives when he knows he does not fire blanks. We know couples who struggle to get a baby and the pain they go through. Men especially can be profoundly affected and society used to laugh at such men, rather stupidly.

Some may say, it is an act of selfishness, not to share our lives with others. As to live and die alone is not exactly fair. My favourite South African writer Darell Bristow Bovey once said that he has no desire to have a baby and people who tell him that he risks not bringing forth a genius like Einstein and he said chances of such are infinitesimal. Makes sense.

My advice is that to be a parent is a good thing if you embrace it. As you age, people become selfish with their time, and you will end up in the bar all alone. Whereas living alone has huge perks, but there is the need for someone to be around. You can choke. You can have a preexisting condition you didn’t know that will attack you and it helps to have family around.

To be alone can be suicidal at times. Your spouse and children remind you that you are accountable and they put checks on you. Back in the village, young men used to be encouraged to marry so as to start being responsible. When you marry, for men, your wife starts to control, you and your schedule, at least in your younger years so as to put your foot down, build a house and even start a family. That way even if you start being reckless, everything will be in order.

The same applies to women. By being married, it protects them from several risks, dangerous sex, and other attendant risks that come with it.

So marriage and childbirth have both biological, social and moral imperatives worth pursuing.

My main reason is that after 45, you will need a good spouse to spend the lonely moments together. You need children somewhere in school to remind you and give you a reason to live.

It gives a sense of balance, a sense of being, and the first line of defense against the vagaries of old age, such as disease, and other problems. No one can protect you better than your family if you have been kind to it. Your parents and siblings may have the obligation, but it is your progeny that will have the ultimate obligation to ensure that you can have your pampers on when you start crapping on yourself.

Sasa enda lunch, mimi wacha nikule ma airburger hapa.

The post May Be It’s Time We All Stopped Reproduction To End Human Suffering appeared first on Kenya Today.

MILLIONS Spent TO DELIVER CITIZEN TV LILIAN MULI’S “VIUSASA” BABY
By Milton Were
Lillian Muli is slowing getting her bearing back on social media after taking almost three weeks off to deliver her second child.

The news anchor even surprised her fans recently after sharing a photo, showing she’s already gotten back her curvy body and flat stomach.

Muli took time to thank the people that made it all possible and ensured everything jellied around seamlessly till baby Liam came. She delivered at Nairobi Hospital, one of the best and most expensive maternity hospitals in Kenya.

“It’s a late post but here goes. Thank you Nairobi Hospital for taking good care of me as I delivered my baby and after. From the CEO Gordon Odundo who stopped by to say hi (what a cool CEO no wonder he is at the helm of leadership at the Hospital) and the nurses who took care of me especially Esther who always made me smile and was so patient with me as she Showed me how to hold baby when breastfeeding and how to bathe him.” She posted on her social media handle.

“Many Thanks to the kind Matrons who always passed by to say Goodmorning. My Doctors Professor Koigi Kamau and his son Dr Kamau koigi, Dr Nyambura Kariuki (paediatrician) I am grateful. Baby and I had a wonderful time at the Hospital because you made us so comfortable. @official_cessp thanks for taking this.”

Muli gave birth on July 23 after some rather controversial nine months which involved Kenyans following her pregnancy on a popular online platform Viusasa. Her delivery, going by the video she posted on social media while thanking the staff, must have costed an arm and a leg but no worries for she got a health insurance cover

Muli was in the private wing and therefore might have parted with at least Ksh 250,000 –on the higher end– for a healthy, Liam.

But what a turn of events when she spiced it all with her new-look full photo that Kenyans did not seem too impressed with; some said she had tucked her tummy after-all!

Check out the photo she shared just two weeks after delivery, she looks stunning !

The post Millions Spent To Deliver Citizen TV Lilian Muli’s ‘Viusasa’ Baby, She Is Full Of Milk, Check Out Photo appeared first on Kenya Today.

Waziri Chacha, the man famous for allegedly bulldozing 13 female MPs is back with a bang!

Known to have a smooth tongue that had him bed not one, not two but 13 politicians, he is back with his bag of tricks full and his tackles sicker.

The undisputed shareholder in mafisi sacco decided to wish Murang’a Woman Rep Sabina Chege a happy birthday through a very uncanny birthday message.

Chacha is also infamous for swindling politicians under false pretense. He registered an MPesa account using Sabina’s name and ended up fleecing money from MPs including those in the Senate.

A number of leaders including cabinet secretaries Eugene Wamalwa, Peter Munya, Margaret Kobia and former MP Jakoyo Midiwo are reported to have sent money to the fake account.

The lanky lad even released a few photos of himself lying in bed with former Bomet Woman Rep Cecilia Ng’etich. He later claimed Sabina was also one of his many conquests but the Murang’a Woman Rep denied the allegations.

Chege claimed Chacha was too cheap to be her toy boy. Well, who knows.

The post Wazir Chacha Sends Ex ‘Lover’ Hon Sabina Chege Special Birthday Message appeared first on Kenya Today.

By Fay Ngina

Citizen TV news anchor Lilian Muli has told off people criticizing her for spending Sh250, 000 on the birth of her second baby.

In a long Instagram post, Lilian said she responded since the comments about her maternity bill were becoming ‘boring’.
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“I’m only going to give this my attention because it’s becoming BORING. If I could spend 10 million or more that God has given me the ability to afford to spend I would spend it to give my baby the best experience, “read part of the post.

Lilian later revealed that she spent more than what people speculated after reading the news on blogs. She even challenged Kenyans to visit Nairobi hospital and enquire how much it cost to deliver the baby.

“If you wanted to know how much I spent you should have just walked into Nairobi Hospital and asked how much it cost trust me if you are upset about 250k that’s a GROSS UNDERESTIMATE! It was much more so prepare to get even more upset because you are talking crap out of ignorance healthcare in this country is very expensive,” she added.

She however went ahead and threw some shade on the people criticizing her, asking them if they contributed anything to the bill.

“And then again I wonder how much you contributed to my bill that gives you the right to have an opinion on my life!!! I will never under any circumstances shy away from enjoying the blessings that come my way and YES my children are such a big deal to me if I want to shout that they are from the mountain top or everywhere I can I will. If it hurts you pole sana you could just choose to look away or not listen!” Lilian added.

“Don’t hate me coz I’m Blessed pray for the same to come your way! Jealousy is the same thing as witchcraft it is evil check yourself! The next time you talk about me just know you are exposing how bitter you are about your life! All the bad things you’ve ever wished me will never come to pass it’s wishful thinking and I suggest you give up. I keep saying Hate has become the veil that frustrated people use to cover up their own insecurities don’t be mad at me I’m not the one who hurt you. That’s the last time I will ever address this nonsense,” she concluded.

The post ANGRY Citizen TV’s Lilian Muli Goes Ballistic, Lashes Out On People Attacking Her For Spending sh250k On Maternity Bill appeared first on Kenya Today.

Workers union boss Francis Atwoli stunned TV viewers on Wednesday night with praises for his new wife and the mention of his Sh5 million gold watch during an interview.

The Cotu Secretary General confirmed his marriage to presenter Mary Kilobi who is half his age.

While explaining why he married Kilobi, Atwoli said his second wife chose to engage in politics despite his advise against this.

“The reason I asked her not to pursue politics was that I needed somebody to take care of me. Since she joined politics, I married Kilobi so that she attends to me,” he said.

The SG met 34-year-old Kilobi in Kampala 13 years ago while she was an intern at the Uganda Broadcasting Corporation.

“I was in the company with my second wife whom I released to do politics. At that particular time, we talked … she was still young … I told her that when she matured, whether it would take 1,000 years, I would marry her.”

Kilobi was 21 and a student at Makerere University at the time.

“She came back to Kenya and got job with Standard. I trust her … she is my assistant and my love and she takes care of me,” Atwoli said.

Interview host Jeff Koinange, of Citizen TV’s Jeff Koinange Live show, asked Atwoli about their sexual relations.

The SG said: “Age does not matter. There is no age limit between a man and a woman. Kazi bado nafanya mbaya sana. Katiba bado nasoma (I am still doing a thorough job. I am still reading the constitution).”

When claims of an affair came up int he interview, Atwoli reiterated that Kilobi is a good woman.

“That’s my wife number two because the second wife went into politics. I knew her 13 years ago. She is a cute girl and is very committed and loving.”

He went on to describe himself as a mature and respected person whose actions are tied to his work.

The boss of the Central Organization of Trade Unions talked about his opulent lifestyle, giving details of how he paid for the gold watch in installments.

“Most people do not know me. Sometimes they over-value me and sometimes they under-value me,” he said.

“People are claiming that my watch is worth Sh2 million. They are undervaluing me. My watch is worth Sh5 million … it is the Frank Muller original bought in Switzerland. You must have a certificate to own this watch. It’s pure gold which I paid for in installments.”

Atwoli also said he has cows, 17 children of his own and 74 children who are not biological.

“I have two cars for myself and I also want Mary to have a comfortable life due to the nature of job that she does,” he said.

The post WHAT Francis Atwoli TOLD Jeff Koinange; Young Wife, 74 Children, 5 Million Watch and Perfect Sex at 69 appeared first on Kenya Today.

WOMEN HAVE ALWAYS FALLEN FOR STRONG MEN Like Atwoli; THAT ISN’T ABOUT TO CHANGE ANYTIME SOON.
==================================
In the years of yore, women were always instinctively attracted to physically strong men.

This was due to the fact that a strong man meant maximum protection to the woman and her progeny.

It also meant that the good genes of the strong man would be passed down to the woman’s children, hence they would be perpetuated in the family.

A strong man did not only command respect and admiration from women, but weaker men also wanted to be in his good books for protection from enemies.

Hence, strong men always had a retinue of weaker men, as their slaves or handymen, around them.

This made such strong men even more attractive to women since ladies instinctively chose dominant males who wielded power over the rest.

Over the years, the strength of a man has since shifted into the wallet. Money cannot only move mountains.

If you ask Clifford Babayao Waititu, he’ll confirm that it can now move rivers too. It actually can change the course of River Nile in order to pave way for a “strong” man’s illegal construction.

Nowadays, the fatter the wallet the stronger the man and the more attractive he is to women. If you believed the cliché that “money is not everything” pause for a minute and think again.

Is there anything meaningful you can do in today’s world without money? Your pastor, who reminds you every Sunday that money is the root cause of all evil on earth, is one of the richest people around.

He lives in a palatial home and drives a top of the range car. He can afford to take his family on holiday trips to exotic destinations. All these things don’t drop from heaven like the proverbial manna. They need real mulla!

No. Women didn’t change. The definition of a strong man changed. A man’s strength now resides in the wallet and the bank account.

Men with fatter wallets and bank account balances which read like phone Numbers (of course beginning with the +254…) are now the real deal. The power of the wallet makes up for any deficiencies in physical attributes.

It doesn’t matter whether such men’s front midsection looks like that of a nine months pregnant woman or an illegal structure threatening to engulf and block his riparian section.

Fat bank account balances make such illegal structures on men’s front midsection look too attractive. In fact they’re a symbol of status of men who are doing well.

You will hear some women justifying such structures by saying things like, “wow! He looks so sexy when he absent mindedly rubs his illegal structure while resting!”

Not that muscular and physically strong men, who look like the ancestors our great grandmothers fell for, don’t exist. You can actually meet plenty of them in places, such as construction sites, where hard labour and paltry wages are the order of the day.

Most of these men have never opened a bank account in their entire life since they live a hand to mouth life. Beautiful ladies hardly give such men a second glance.

But then again, you can’t blame the ladies for shunning such men. A broke man is usually deprived of one of the most important assets a man can ever possess: self esteem.

Such men are likely to be rough, irritable and ill tempered. They’re not fun to be with. Once in a while, if he’s physically well endowed, a hot chick might fall for the broke “mjengo” man (hassler); but just for riparian things in between the sheets and not for keeps.

When she’s ready to settle, she will go and look for a man who’s strong in modern terms (read a fat wallet and bank account). A man like Katibu Atwoli.

This way, just like her great grandmothers, her security and that of her progeny is assured.

How then can you even begin blaming TV anchor Mary Kilobi for choosing SG Atwoli over the socialite young men within her circles?

I mean Atwoli is a strong young man in modern terms! A man who wears a watch worth Ksh.5,0000,000 can attract women like a lamp attracts moths because that makes him so strong and attractive.

The guy has only been Seventy since 2012. In fact the other day he just turned 69. He still has four more years to be 70. Such miracles only happen to those whose bank accounts are overflowing. Mary Kilobi just did what a normal woman could do. The lady is in safe hands.

So guys, instead of spending all your time in the gym in order to acquire abs, and a well toned body, go and spend that time acquiring wealth.

Otherwise, you will keep wondering why all hot chicks are choosing the Atwolis of this world and their “vitambis” over your abs and toned body. Tuko pamoja hapo nyuma?

The post WOMEN HAVE ALWAYS FALLEN FOR STRONG MEN Like Atwoli; THAT ISN’T ABOUT TO CHANGE ANYTIME SOON. appeared first on Kenya Today.

The Worst Thing I Eve Did For Money

#ThursdayEveningThrowback

Back in college, one of the ways we used to make money was attend Focus Group Discussions of various products in the markets that marketers were keen to get feedback from the market.

Now each product in the market has a target audience. Most of the FGDs, wanted working class people between 28-45. Now those carrying out the surveys had difficulty getting people in that bracket.

There is no way you are going to get a busy 35-year-old man middle-level manager to attend two-hour session to discuss an aftershave. He has better things to do, like the new employee with an ass to kill for busy ignoring him like he did not buy a Mercedes C200 last week.

In the place of busy men in the offices, they used to come for university kids and we will pose as working class, even though our cheap dressing, cheap shoes and dry lips betrayed us. I remembered, one day my friends (I won’t mention their names, they are now happily married and serving the GOK), went for a whiskey testing and comparison FGDs), and they drunk so much and got high as kites on the job, they were kicked out and missed out on their Sh 500 compensation.

The drill was simple. The recruiter will call a contact in campus, who will recruit us, based on age, height, body fat and such. The idea was for us to look as old as possible and a clever mixture of fat, tall and short people could help deceive the panel (mostly women) conducting the FGDs. Often we would end up in a room and you are asked your age, and you say “32” with a straight face, but you look every 23 years of your time on earth, immature, shy, and unsure of anything. But the women knew they were playing a game, fleecing companies and to compensate a 30-year old for their time was going to be costly, so we both knew we were bullshitting. Bullshit is the fuels that runs this town.

So, we would be told, “Leo, ni hii whisky tunaongelea, read about it, and have some knowledge about it.” And we would go online and try read anything, call anyone we thought knew anything about whiskey. And show up ready for the job.

Now, the worst one I ever attended was one about Vaseline Lotion for men. When I was called, I was excited for the Sh 500 I was going to be given. It was immediately after campus, and I was so broke that church mice used me for comparison for brokenness. I was in that phase after campus you eat once every two days and you are adjusting the silly hopes of “I can’t take a job of less than 100,000”. We were in that acceptance stage, where even a Sh 20,000 jo was welcome.

So, I show up at the 5-star hotel, ready for the interview. Our time came, we are ushered into a room. About 7 men in their 20s and an odd two of them in their 30s. And interviewing us were two women in their better side of 30s. You know those confident, playful, at times serious women…

I looked around and the realization of seven men talking about the merits of Vaseline Lotion hit me so hard, I nearly collapsed with laughter. The Walanguzi song, “Mi napenda Vaseline” started playing in my mind. At the time, Kenyans on Twitter was on fire, with young men cracking nasty jokes daily. One of the common theme then was masturbation.

Now, I sat in that room, doing everything not to laugh, but boy, it was the toughest thing. Every time a man started how smooth, how blab la bla the lotion was, I could only remember the jokes.

Man.

Funny, as a man I hold that men should never use jelly or lotion. I think men should only shower once weekly. But there I was talking about the lotion like I had ever bought one.

There was this guy. Probably a Luo or one of those flamboyant Luhyia. He was dark, handsome, with white eyes, and his hair was shiny and dark. He spoke with an admirable (to women mostly) British accent, and I saw how the women were looking at him when he spoke. Even so, there was something queer about him, he was probably gay.

“I like the cool, luxuriating and smooth feel of the lotion on the skin. I tend to gravitate towards Vaseline than nivea,” I would hold forth the laughter. He used the word gravitate so repeatedly, so annoyingly but in that group he seemed to be the only one who used the lotion or had done his assignment.

Afterwards we talked. He was a cool card. He told me he lives in Britain, is a novelist, or something abstract, but I wondered his profile, didn’t match the need for Sh 500.

Been there. Done it. I have the T-shirt.

By Silas Nyanchwani

The post The Worst Thing I Eve Did For Money appeared first on Kenya Today.

By Mpasho

Citizen tv’s morning show ,day break presenter Joey Muthengi broke the air yesterday by answering the highly rumoured relationship with a Kenyan Governor which we won’t disclose now.

Joey Muthengi posted a picture of her sister who got married recently and the wedding looked quite expensive and of course, Joey killed it. The comments on that picture made Joey open up.

Something Joey has been throwing all over her social media is that she is dating a governor, which one? we have no idea.

So Joey Muthengi looking all gorgeous posted a picture of her sister and husband. Then the comments flooded.
Frasha from P-unit commented saying:
Your next #lafamilia

This is what sparked some comments. Another fan asked when her wedding will be and Joey had an answer:
Next year 😅
Then the governor story came up again. So yes, Joey is dating a certain governor. But who could this be who is not married?

From the many comments on when she was getting married, she posted another picture after a long day at the wedding and posted:

Tired but happy. Showed Governor your comments, asked him when our church wedding is akasema tutapanga pole pole 😅😅. Seriously tho. #BibiYaGovernor
You heard it from the horse’s mouth herself. So stop giving her pressure, her time is coming and it will be as soon as next year.

Joey confessed during their money show, Daybreak that she loves old men. So now that we have enough hints, we need to unveil who this old governor is. We just hope she is not settling to become a second wife.
If she gets married, she’ll join a list of other celebrities who have married this year after KTNs Mary kilobi married with Cotu sec.gen. Francis atwoli

The post Love In The Air: Meet The Governor Who Will Marry Citizen TV Presenter Joey Muthengi appeared first on Kenya Today.

A Face book post by one Brenda Cheruto mourning fallen athlete Nicholas Bett as her husband caused a stir.

This was because Bett’s known legal wife was known to be Gladys Bett with whom they have three children.

“I will always remember your words every morning. That, ‘babe: I have told you I’m your dad, not only your hubby, and I feel very safe in your hands.’ Words can never describe your kindness, those who were close to you know the kind of person you were,” Brenda Cheruto wrote on Face book.

She has since opened up about her affair to the celebrated athlete.

“Bett was my husband and pillar of life, and we have a daughter together,”

In Uasin Gishu, Bett’s wife, Gladys, was also pouring out her heart to her lost love.

Her tribute to her husband read in part: “I have lost a golden heart. I celebrate you, my sweetheart. You always loved us. You loved me like your own sister.”

Glady’s tribute did not go down well with Cheruto, who accused her and the family of editing her tribute and making it their own.

In an interview with The Nairobian, Cheruto opened up about her relationship with the sprinter, who died in a grisly road accident on August 8 as he was heading home from Nairobi.

“He (Bett) landed from Nigeria on Monday evening (August 6), and I welcomed him at the airport. He was calm as we proceeded home. We did not go out for dinner as we had anticipated but headed straight home. He did not sleep either that night, as he claimed he had slept on the plane,” Cheruto told The Nairobian.

She, however, told The Nairobian that she has no plans of engaging in a battle over her share of the wealth the ‘Kenyan style’.

“He is gone and I respect him because he loved me. If the family will take care of his child, that would be fine. But I will not impose and I am ready to take care of our daughter because Nicholas taught me to be humble in life. I’ve not come out now that he is gone. I was there before. I am not interested in his wealth, because he is the one who worked for it,” she stated.

Cheruto says she first met Bett at her father’s burial in 2016. They fell in love while she was a college student in Ruiru.

Bett, who was at the time a traffic police officer based in Kisumu, was transferred to Lang’ata in Nairobi. It was then that they started living together as she was expecting his child

The post Fallen Athlete Nicholas Bett’s Baby Mama Accuses Wife of Stealing Her Eulogy appeared first on Kenya Today.

Former presidential candidate Mohamed Abduba Dida is facing a Sh12 million divorce case from one of his three wives Estail Ali Ibrahim after 10-years of marriage.

The estranged wife cited cruelty, contempt and disrespect from Dida whom he accuses of calling her a prostitute.

She wants Dida restrained from spreading what she terms as accusations about her, including allegations of adultery when she was married to another man, Takrem ‘Thomas’Daido Dulu, before meeting Dida.

She also wants the court to compel Takrem Dulu to undergo a paternity test to ascertain that he’s the father of her 18year old son.

Estail says Dulu-whom she asked to convert to Islam- left her after she gave birth and met Dida whom she is now divorcing.

In her case at the Kadhi’s court in Nairobi, Estail is seeking Sh12 million as accrued expenses calculated at a rate of Sh100, 000 per month over 10 years.

Estail argues she has been Dida’s wife since September 5th 2008 under the Islamic Sharia Law and says Dida paid Sh1, 000 as bride price.

Their marriage at Masjid Nur mosque was witnessed by Sheikh M. Hassan, A. Razak Moulid and Abdi Ali Ibrahim according to the marriage certificate serial number B13306/296/2008.

In her Divorce case No. 112 filed in April last year, she claims that Dida has not contributed financially to the maintenance of the family in terms of food and shelter and has instead left the burden of to her, even after she lost her job in May.

Estail claims that she has been a co-wife to Dida’s other wives Amina and Rukia-but he chose to give priority to his first wife, alleging she has been patient for a long time.

Dida’s wife has also asked the court to compel him to provide for the accrued bills, including and not limited to consolatory gift for the period of marriage and pay her three months jiddah alimony.

Courtesy, Nairobian

The post EX Presidential Candidate Abduba Dida to Pay Wife 12million after Calling Her a Prostitute appeared first on Kenya Today.

President Uhuru Kenyatta’s niece Nana Gecaga is a single 40 year old mother of three who has stuff handed to her on a silver plata but still views herself as a self made corporate manager.

In an interview with the Business Daily, Nana, the granddaughter to founding President Mzee Jomo Kenyatta confessed that her biggest struggle has been getting a genuine partner since most people are only interested in her status and networks.

She had been asked to name the one thing that she had always wanted and could not achieve.

“Getting a genuine partner, I would say. I have struggled with relationships. I have had a couple of good relationships, but mostly it’s been difficult because the people have not been interested in me as a person,”

She was, however, quick to point out that she did not wish to be born in a different family, saying the love from her family was enough consolation.

“But this is not supposed to elicit sympathy. I don’t say I wish I was not born in a family like this, the love that they provide is undisputed. Like I said I’ve got three beautiful children. I am a single mother and I am not dating or anything like that,” she added.

In a previous interview, the KICC CEO also opened up on her struggle with alcoholism, but which she surmounted and has not fallen back for the past 19 years.

Nana is the daughter to President Uhuru Kenyatta’s elder sister, Jeni Wambui.

The post President Uhuru’s Niece Nana Gecaga Says she is Single Because Men only Love Her Money appeared first on Kenya Today.

Well, this is trending photo in which Statehouse spokeswoman/person is seen wearing a top that looks nearly similar to a shirt of Uhuru. Funny how Kenyans online have resorted to an imaginary VAR to determine if indeed the beautiful Kanze is wearing her boss’ shirt.

Well may Uhuru gave it away, the refeee has signalled play on , the two are near similar but not same!

The post BUSTED: Statehouse Spokeswoman Kanze Dena Caught Red Handed ‘Wearing’ Uhuru Shirt- Hilarious appeared first on Kenya Today.

KTN News anchor Mary Kilobi speaks out about her love for Francis Atwoli, past relationships and how she handles the coolest grandpa in this great country. Listen and dont judge please

For the 34-year-old this is strange as growing up as an orphan, life taught her to always take care of herself.
“There are things I want to do on my own but I now realize that there are helpers around me. And I just need to sit and enjoy. But I am used to running around and doing all these things.

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KTN news anchor Mary Kilobi (Instagram)
“There are people always there with me saying madam ‘how are you?, how can I help you? There is breakfast what do you want to have?

“I was not used to that kind of life,” she said.

The post VIDEO: KTN TV’s Mary Kilobi And Francis Atwoli INVITES You To Their Wedding, Watch Them Stepping Out In Style ! appeared first on Kenya Today.

By Milton Were

After weeks and months of romance, the sad day for the controversial celebraties come couple just arrived, Kenyan socialite Vera Sidika has taken to her social media pages regreting all that has happenned to her and said further that shes human after being Dumped by Kenyan artist Otile Brown.

Vera and Otile in Mauritius/fb

“Turns out again that after all the love, all the hard work, all the time, Otile brown says he doesnt love me again. I ask him since when? He says Since the Mauritius tour. That is barely 2 weeks after helping him trend his new Song BABY LOVE. That is the world for me but I remain a strong Woman, focussed and always sure of my self. I cant even believe am typing this.” read vera’s statement on facebook.
The two have had a nice holiday in mauritious and even took released a song together confirming their love.
earlier on Vera took to her facebook page and condemed those who had wished her wrong things that they dont have a space in her life when whey released “BABY LOVE” song.
Vera complains of offering to be a video vixen in Otile Brown’s song despite not allowing other artistes who had big cash for it.

“Tabu watapata sana wenye wivu. Itawacosti sana”
“We just Knew haters had to rant. Now our love is reloaded. Check Our new hit song with otile brown on youtube. Trending number 1 right now. Share !Share !Share! The name of the song is BABY LOVE. Haters you are pissed!!”
Otile had earlier on promised Vera heaven through his statement
“My bestie and Will always be , I appreciate loyalty and real ones , I’ll fight your wars and defend you even if you’re on the wrong , have to be true and real to my self .. #TBT #mauritius🇲🇺”
Al’mradi unanipenda peke yetu tutaishi kwenye hii dunia .. #babylove
Haya basi ,kaa mkao wa kula Kama hivi , Kisha uniambie tukiwakishe..#Babylove .. Amini Nakupenda tarifa ndo huna”
Dimming someone’s light won’t make yours shine brighter.

If you’re hater be a real one .Don’t be two faced ..Anyway
We lity till God says otherwise

The post Singer Otile Brown Dumps Socialite Vera Sidika after months of social media love appeared first on Kenya Today.

45 THINGS A GIRL WANT, BUT WON’T ASK FOR:

1. Touch her waist.
2. Actually talk to her.
3. Share secrets with her.
4. Give her your jacket.
5. Kiss her slowly. Are you remembering this?
6. Hug her.
7. Hold her.
8. Laugh with her.
9. Invite her somewhere.
10. Hangout with her and your friends together.

KEEP READING ..

11. Smile with her.
12. Take pictures with her.
13. Pull her onto your lap.
14. When she says she loves you more, deny it. Fight back.
15. When her friends say “I love her more than you”, deny it. Fight back and hug her tight so she can’t
get to her friends. It makes her feel loved.

Are you thinking of someone?

16. Always hug her and say I love you whenever you see her.
17. Kiss her unexpectedly.
18. Hug her from behind around the waist.
19. Tell her she’s beautiful.
20. Tell her the way you feel about her.

One last thing you need to do to show her you actually do mean it.

21. Open doors for her, walk her to her car – it makes her feel protected, plus it never hurts to act like a gentleman.
22. Tell her she’s your everything – only if you mean it.
23. If it seems like there is something wrong, ask her – if she denies something being wrong, it means SHE DOESN’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT – so just hug her.
24. Make her feel loved.
25. Kiss her in front of OTHER girls you know! WE MIGHT DENY IT BUT WE ACTUALLY LIKE AND KINDA WANT YOU TO TICKLE US ..
26. Don’t lie to her.
27. DON’T cheat on her.
28. Take her ANYWHERE she wants.
29. Text message or call her in the morning and tell her have a good day at school, and how much you miss her.
30. Be there for her whenever she needs you, and even when she doesn’t need you, just be there so she’ll know that she can always count on you.

ARE YOU STILL READING THIS? YOU BETTER, BECAUSE IT’S IMPORTANT.

31. Hold her close when she’s cold so she can hold you too.
32. When you are alone hold her close and kiss her.
33. Kiss her on the cheek; (it will give her the hint that you want to kiss her).
34. While in the movies, put your arm around her and then she will automatically put her head on your shoulder, then lean in and tilt her chin up and kiss her lightly.
35. Don’t ever tell her to leave even jokingly or act like you’re mad. If she’s upset, comfort her. REMEMBER ALL THESE THINGS WHEN YOU ARE WITH HER NEXT ..
36. When people diss her, stand up for her.
37. Look deep into her eyes and tell her you love her.
38. Lay down under the stars and put her head on your chest so she can listen to the steady beat of your heart, link your fingers together while you whisper to her as she rests her eyes and listens you.
39. When walking next to each other grab her hand.
40. When you hug her, hold her in your arms as long as possible.

MAKE SURE SHE KNOWS SHES LOVED.

41. Call or text her at night to wish her sweet dreams.
42. Comfort her when she cries and wipe away her tears.
43. Take her for long walks at night.
44. Always remind her how much you love her.
45. Sit on top of her and tell her how much you love her and then bend down to her face and kiss her while you’re sitting on her. You’ll never know when she needs just a little more love .. !

The post 45 THINGS A GIRL WANT, BUT WON’T ASK FOR: appeared first on Kenya Today.

Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender (LGBT) flag has been spotted on an apartment block located along Lenana Road, on the junction of Wood Avenue and Lenana Road.

The flag comprises of the rainbow colours, with an addition of hot pink colour at the top.

Despite being outlawed, LGBTs have become bolder nowadays, with some coming out in the public and admitting subscribing to the group.

They have gone further to create a coalition and an online platform, the Gay And Lesbian Coalition Of Kenya (GALCK).

According to information on their website, GALCK was established in 2006, and began with an initial membership 4 organizations and expanded to 6 by the end of 2008. GALCK later expanded in membership to 14 and 16 in 2012 and 2014 respectively.

In 2013, GALCK rolled out a devolution process through which to decentralise its operations and programming beyond Nairobi.

This process devolved the GALCK membership into three regional clusters, named after the peaks of Mount Kenya, Batian, Lenana and Nelion, which essentially categorized member organizations by the regions in which they are based and operate.

Read full story at KAHAWATUNGU

The post Homosexuals Advertising Their Status Openly In Nairobi, See Flag On Apartment In Kilimani Area appeared first on Kenya Today.

Family planning for what? You get a boy and a kijana avute bangi Na msichana aolewe utabaki na nani? Atwoli posed at a function this year but little did people know that the sentiment would later incite a former party secretary general and Foreign Affairs Chief Administrative Secretary (CAS) Ababu Namwamba who is now staying with two very beautiful and young women.

The COTU secretary general has been advocating for polygamy, saying that it is the only way the number of single ladies can be reduced in this world.

The world over, there are more women than men (about 65 percent). If we dont marry many wives, who will marry our daughters? I am encouraging my sons to marry more than three wives so that we can reduce the population of unmarried women. Its a taboo in our community to bury our daughters where they were born, they must be married somewhere, he said. Family planning for what? You get a boy and a girl. Kijana avute bangi na msichana aoleweutabaki na nani? (The boy child will smoke bhang while the girl child will be marriedwho will you remain with?) he posed at a function in July this year.

Maybe trying to spite his former wife and make her go nuts, Namwamba is staying with a lady called Luciana Mimo and Paula Ann. Paula is known to be a former Miss Tourism Busia winner.
While Luciana Nimo stays in Ababu Namwambas rural home, Paula Ann stays in his Nairobi home and is alleged to be serving all his needs in the same or in the words of Atwoli, she is taking good care of bwana CAS.

Ababu’s friends and relatives, especially neighbors in Nairobi have been surprised that he is openly randy and/or polygamous as they cannot differentiate what is with the affair.#MulembeLoveConciousness

Ababu Namwamba is separated from his wife Priscah Mwaro who accused him of infidelity and cruelty. The Nairobian also run an exclusive expose that alleged bwana CAS had slept with various relatives.

This story first appeared on KAHAWATUNGU and NEWSTODAY

The post Hon Ababu Namwamba Follows Francis Atwoli’s Style, Kicks Out Wife, ‘Marries’ Two BEAUTIES, Check Out Photos appeared first on Kenya Today.

By Onyinkwa Onyakundi

With more important events such as the reported arrest of Waititu’s high school geography teacher to discuss, i wasn’t going to wade into the Atwoli-Kilobi discussion until i saw sentiments by the toxic Kenyan feminists who refuse to accept the reality that men and women were created different, each with their own unique and well defined strengths roles in a marriage. There are five realities they need to accept, but i’ll dwell on just one ~ the place of money in marriage.

First, arguing that young men are players, are disrespectful and lack the decisiveness and commitment that old men possess and giving an old man taking in a 3rd wife as the example is no different from Waititu suggesting that the rivers are the problem, and not the buildings put up on their paths. It is simply an attempt to pretend away the undeniable reality of money’s ‘sabuni ya roho’ place in a marriage simply because it doesn’t sit well with the ‘women are unbwogably’ independent and don’t need men’ narrative.

Secondly, arguing that Kilobi’s love for Atwoli has nothing to do with the fact that he is an extremely wealthy guy is no different from listening to Ruto condemn corruption. One even suggested that no one should ever claim that Atwoli is wealthier than Kilobi unless they have ever seen the bank statements of both. How is that any different from suggesting that no one should ever claim that Cyprian Awiti of Homa Bay does not have a six pack tummy unless they have ever seen him shirtless?

Thirdly, is there anything really the matter with accepting that one of the main considerations that any smart woman must take into account before choosing to settle down in marriage with any man ought to be his financial stability? Before this feminist madness poisoned the minds of the misguided few who hold the misguided view that accepting the man’s natural and God prescribed role of provider and protector amounts to perpetuating gender inequality, men used to be men, and women used to be women, and we were all happy and content in places.

Fourth, why ~ pray tell me ~ did Mary Kilobi feel the need to call the press and announce to the world that Atwoli’s immense wealth played absolutely no role in her decision to dump her fiance and marry Atwoli who is decades older than him and herself? Imagine how ridiculous it would have been had Atwoli called the press, banged tables and called doubters ‘Washenzi’ to announce to the world that Mary Kilobi’s beauty had absolutely nothing to do with his decision to marry her. And while at it, he demanded to be ‘rikokonized’ as a world figure in the ‘LABOUR movement’.

And finally, beyond Atwoli’s vast wealth, the guy rolls like the ‘celebs’ that most TV girls adore. He drives a state of the art Mercedes-Benz car whose colour changes according to its surroundings much like a chameleon does, dons gold watches, rings, neck pieces and such other bling. It is therefore the height of deception to suggest that she didn’t do no ‘lifestyle audit’ on the old player and like the report before presenting it to a joint committee of her girlfriends and close relatives who agreed not to shoot it down when she later tabled it to the public.

The post FINAL WORD On Francis Atwoli And His Love KTN TV Anchor Mary Kilobi appeared first on Kenya Today.

Satan and William Ruto

By Kevin Omwanza

(Satan takes William Ruto to the rooftop of KICC Tower and shows him the whole of Nairobi Province and neighboring places)

SATAN: Mheshimiwa, I will give you all of these if you bow down and worship me! In any case, you are obsessed with lands and material wealth.

RUTO: It is written, ‘worship the Lord your God and serve him only,’

SATAN: But you have been serving and worshiping Mammon! You are a rabid capitalist consumed by an all-consuming passion to amass wealth by hook or crook! Stop with the pretense and take all these lands that I now give you! Take all these wealth, all these vehicles, all these that you now see bedazzle your eyes with their ethereal glamour!

RUTO: (After mulling for a moment) Get behind me Satan! My case is with my God! He who pardoned all men for their immense sins shall on the day of tribulation stand in my stead and put all my accusers to shame! Even David who prostituted with Uriah’s wife and planned his death at the battlefront and was rebuked by the Prophet Nathan was in the final account esteemed as a Man after God’s own heart!

SATAN: (Laughs out loud, and so derisive is his laughter that Ruto’s brow furls into a furrow) For death by bursting awaits a toad that imagines it can swell into an elephant! You poor man cannot imagine yourself as a David, or can you?!

RUTO: Of toads and elephants and swelling I know nothing, but My Lord who hath encompassed my soul with love shall not suffer you to grieve my spirit any more! For verily on the day of Moses’ death you contended with Michael for Moses’ body. And though Michael was as righteous and guileless as the sun, he constrained himself not to rebuke you. At the time you believed as you now do that I deserved hell more than I did heaven. And today I caution you Satan, that my Lord who I see descend in a Chariot of Flaming Fires shall shortly reproof and repulse you!

SATAN: You speak so confidently of your righteousness, but just as ardently, you lie to the poor, and by your wicked craft, deprive them of their possessions (points to Weston Hotel)

RUTO: My righteousness is as filthy rags before the Lord God. I shall boast of nothing, for by mine own self, I am nothing. But this is my confidence – that by Christ’s stripes, I am healed, and that by accepting him in my life, I am accounted as righteous!

SATAN: Tell that to the birds! You and I know that your heart is as filthy and soot-black as a witch’s pot!

RUTO: That is what they all say! As I said, my case is before the Almighty who shall on that woeful day adjudge as between your truth and mine!

SATAN: Everyone says you are corrupt, murderous, and that in your dark heart, you harbor deadly ambitions.

RUTO: Man sees only the obvious, but the examiner of hearts is God! For when the Prophet of the Mighty God came to David’s father saying the Lord had chosen a King of Israel from among his sons, David’s father could not understand why from among strong and more virtuous men God could settle on a lowly and humble David – but the Prophet reckoned, ‘God does not see as a man sees!’

(Just then there is a dazzling and blinding light from the skies and Satan jumps from KICC, disappears into the city, and breaks into several smithereens of people like myself who like judging others)🤣

DISCLAIMER: This is not to say William Ruto is as righteous as cast in this story. The point is that us as human beings are oft not very introspective. We see little, and judge too much. My repute is just as an iceberg. There is more to myself, or yourself, that is not very evident to the ever-prying eyes of the public. And the rest of the iceberg may not necessarily correspond to the obvious iceberg.

The post William Ruto Defeats Satan On Top Of KICC, Rejects Biggest Land Offer- The Righteous Hustler ! appeared first on Kenya Today.